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Agua Verde, Baja California Sur //
What does it mean to be content? For me, it’s a state in which I’m not wanting for anything while simultaneously feeling profoundly grateful for what I have. The relentless desire for more (stuff, status, money, credentials, friends, etc.) seemingly fades away, and what’s left is complete satisfaction with the here and now. I would say there’s a strong correlation between addiction and the desire to be content. Even simply engaging regularly in unhealthy habits is a symptom of discomfort and a longing to feel at ease. (For me, that salve is food. My logical brain knows food is not the answer, but my emotional brain always turns to food for comfort, distraction, and pleasure.)
In my experience, contentedness is an elusive thing. It reveals itself to me just long enough to prove that it’s real and worth pursuing. Today, from the moment I wake to the moment I go to sleep, I am met by this euphoric state. I float through the day with zero resistance or inner turmoil of any kind. I do a little bit of work, a little bit of recreating, a little bit of socializing, all with ease. I feel a great deal of love for our tiny home on wheels and all it provides us. And I love the people we’re surrounded by and how much they appreciate this alternative way of living.
If you read “Day 117: The State of My Mind,” you know that I was feeling the opposite of content just a week ago. My mind was running amok to the point that thoughts of moving into a house were beginning to take up residency inside my brain. I tend to think a major life change will solve my inner turmoil. That’s when I asked myself what do you really need because I knew a mortgage wasn’t the answer.
It’s amazing what asking yourself the right question can deliver because the response I got was immediate. My inner knowing responded, “more exercise and less social media.” When an answer like this is delivered so clearly and straight from my gut, I know I’d be a fool not to listen. And so that’s what I did.
“What do I need?” It’s such a simple question.
Giving myself what I needed was the key that unlocked the door to contentment. Ironically, contentment went on to show me that I don’t need anything. Who knows how long this state of mind will last. It’s like a drug and no doubt will eventually fade away. But all it takes is a 24-hour hit for me to know it exists and that it’s worth pursuing as if my life depended on it.
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